I've Got Friends in Low Places (don't worry, I don't really like Garth Brooks)

As we get older, it definitely gets harder to make friends.  When we're young, we're thrown together in a big playpen called "school."  We're forced to share with others; we learn how to communicate; we loosen up at parties.  We work in restaurants and at the mall together.  We sit next to each other in classes.

While living in Korea, we gelled with each other because we were foreigners in a foreign land.  Our glue is the strangeness and our loneliness.  It took me a long time to remind myself not to make friends with people whom I wouldn't befriend in my home country.

And when I moved to San Diego, I was so worried that I wouldn't make any friends.  I know, I know...it does seem ridiculous.  But I didn't know how or what or where or when to do that.  I felt awkward.  Uncomfortable.  Afraid.

However, during the past few days, I've realized how lucky I am to have met the few people here that I have.  Of course, my old friends will always hold a special place in my heart, but it feels as though those doors in my heart have closed by Time and Distance (to whom I am shaking my fist).  It's the fault of no one, really.  Unless the blame is mine.

I had dinner with B tonight.  She complained about work and life.  Not COMPLAIN, just unloaded.  Then she started telling me that her friend's sister was schizophrenic.  Suddenly, she said, "I shouldn't complain about work.  Life could be worse."  Sure, I couldn't agree more.  But does that not mean that the problems in our lives are not at all important just because someone else has it worse?  Of course not.

Last night, V came over.  We ate kalbi with Z (who grilled it) and just talked.  It was just a relaxing night.  Who could ask for more? 

So I raise my glass to those of you in my past and present.  Whether we met at work, school, or some strange bar, I am lucky to have or have had you in my life.

No Beautiful Pictures; Just Words

Only so this doesn't turn into an eating blog, I want to make a list of all the awesomeness I've done since I moved to San Diego (in no particular order--just how they pop into my mind):

1. Went to a no-rae-bang
2. Took a day trip to Joshua Tree
3. Drove to Las Vegas (ohhhh, just a few times)
4. Ate In-N-Out (ok, Californians, it's good, but it's not all that).
5. Won a Halloween Contest (but I haven't taken part of the prize yet--Skydiving isn't something I'm ready to do RIGHT now.)
6. Won a Nirve bicycle (which I sold on craigslist, but I won it anyway)
7. Been to my first nude beach
8. Started a blog
9. Found a great job with great people
10. Have been able to bike to the library and the sushi restaurant
11. Almost made it through Six Feet Under
12. Have gotten a reputation for being a good baker (umm, for those who know me from before, it's a shock, I know)
13. Started practicing the keyboard again
14. Experienced "Wally World" (aka, Magic Mountain)
15. Tried Taiwanese ramen
16. Found a favorite wine
17. Drove East and laid out by the pool of a Days Inn
18. Made some great friends

Here are some things I want to do:

1. Go to Mexico
2. Go skydiving
3. Go back to Las Vegas (hee hee)
4. Go to Julien and eat a Julien pie
5. Visit Yosimite (and Big Sur)
6. Learn to surf or at least give it a try
7. Win another Halloween contest
8. Get my parents out here
9. Grow some herbs or some tomatoes or something

That covers it for now.  I'll try to get it done.

You Can Take the Girl Out of the South, But...

I went to Phil's BBQ in Point Loma this week.  And it is delicious, but again, I feel like I'm cheating.

In Owensboro, Kentucky, there's a little place called Moonlite BBQ.  It's a local treasure, and I have been a longtime lover.  Moonlite is buffet-style with BBQ beef, chicken, lamb, and pulled pork.  Well, for me two out of three ain't bad.  The rest of the buffet is also amazing: green beans, baked beans, creamed corn, regular corn, cornbread, biscuits, sweet potatoes, potato salad, french fries, fried tomatoes and cole slaw.  There is a salad bar, but who has time and space for SALAD?  It's a BUFFET, people!

And as always, you should have saved room for dessert.  Because if you didn't, you'll regret it the rest of the day.  Peanut Butter Pie!  Cherry Cobbler!  Everyday!  There are other desserts, but if you're in Kentucky, you have to eat cherry cobbler, and if you at Moonlite, you have to eat peanut butter pie.

Dessert is buffet, too!

How much could all of this delectable food cost?  Good questions: $12.99 Monday through Thursday at dinner, $16.49 on Friday and Saturday at dinner.

Moonlite BBQ isn't just another restaurant.  It's kind of special.  And if you made it through the beginning of this blog, then you may just be a dedicated enough reader to continue.  This place reminds me of my sister.  We love Cracker Barrel and we love Moonlite.  If I go to Moonlite when I'm home, you can bet my sister, J, is right next to me.

Up here in the city, feels like things are closing in.

The sunset's just my light bulb burning out.

I miss Kentucky and I miss my family.

All the sweetest winds, they blow across the south..."

--Ryan Adams, O My Sweet Carolina

Phil's BBQ
3750 Sports Arean Blvd.
92110
(Just follow the smell of sweet BBQ)


Moonlite BBQ
2840 West Parrish Avenue
Owensboro, KY 42301

Gimme One Reason

And here is one reason to love San Diego.  In January of this year, Z and I would race to Sunset Cliffs to get a good view of a beautiful sunset, but this one took me by surprise.

I had come home from a long, tiring, tedious, stressful day at work and decided to pass out in our comfy chair.  When I woke up, I decided to take Sophie out for a little walk.  And these beautiful colors are what I saw.

It has been a long time to post.  Since my birthday actually.  In another blog, on my one year anniversary in San Diego, I posted mine and Z's emails across the country.

Although it does feel like a year in some ways, it doesn't in others.  I got lost on my way to Fashion Valley mall a few weeks ago.  I drove to Mission Valley instead.  I still have to use GPS more often than I'd like to admit.  I haven't been to a Padres game or been on the USS Midway.

But it has been one year in the fact that I've met some pretty amazing people.  I realize now that as one gets older, it truly becomes more difficult to cultivate friendships.  Maybe it's a greater risk with higher gain or maybe we learn how to guard ourselves.  Regardless, it's been hard, but definitely worth it.

But I still fight becoming a Californian.

This sunset...may just change my mind.

Saeng Il Pah Ti

That means "birthday party" in Korean.  Since the last post, the sun decided to peek its head from the blanket of clouds it was so comfortably sleeping under...and I believe it was only for my birthday.  What a great birthday present.

It all started with my students and co-workers on Thursday.  When I came to work, I was welcomed with two banners reading, "Feliz Cumpleanos" and "It's A Girl."  As the day progressed, V had the students make birthday cards for me (remind you: we teach adults), and there was a delicious cake prepared by R and V.  Then one of my students bought me an amazing M&Ms ice cream cake.

But this is about me finding San Diego, and I have to say that on Friday, I realized how much a year changes things.  We went to Min Sok Chon on Convoy Street in Kearney-Mesa neighborhood.  It is a Korean-style bar with different dishes and small karaoke rooms line the sides of the restaurant.  Z planned for us to all meet in a room.

We actually went there on the Tuesday prior to check things out and the server/hostess was soooooo nice to us.  "Oh, I can make your cocktail soju strong," "Oh, it's not a problem."  But on Friday, she was like Medusa.  She was rude enough to make one of my guests ask for another server.  I felt like I needed an elements chart and a TI-85 just to understand how happy hour worked.  "You can order one large cocktail soju and two bottles of regular soju or you can order eight bottles of regular soju and two beers and you can only order two bottles of soju per person that is currently in your party."  Then divide by the square root of evil and you have our server.

So my review of Min Sok Chon--BAD News: a little expensive, happy hour ends at 8 p.m., our server sucked.  GOOD news:  Good food, good Yakult cocktail soju, awesome karaoke equipment, no funny smell.  If I go back, I'll just sit in the restaurant area, and then when I'm good and liquored up, I'll move to the karaoke room.

Honestly, I was worried that no one would actually show up.  As I said in my first post, I felt like I had holed myself up in my apartment in OB and hadn't explored or even slightly invested time or energy into the people I've met here.  One of my friends said on my FB page, "It looks like you never left Korea!  Make some American friends."  Why?  Because all of my pictures are of my students and me.

But everyone I invited, excluding the people who live light years away, showed up.  I can't even begin to describe how I felt, and "special" doesn't seem to cut it.

Maybe I've judged San Diego too early.

On Saturday, EK and R stayed over at my house, and then EV and NMZ (Not My Z) came over.  I met EV in Tennessee way back in the day, before her prime and while I was living in mine.  She was quiet and shy and I didn't really know what to think of her.  We reunited in Korea when she was a bit older and for some odd reason, I was still the same age.  Despite the fact that she was one of my closest friends' ex, we became good friends.  She just got back from her second trip to Korea with NMZ, and she told me that I had inspired her to travel across the country.  How amazing.  I inspired another.

My actual birthday was Father's Day which causes most people to forget I was born.  But thanks to FB, I woke up with a gajillion messages--reminding me that I have met a lot of people on my journey through life.

So all-in-all, San Diego ain't too bad.

My next destination is Lucho Libre...I gotta go check out the fried cheese french fry tacos.  WHAT?!?!

Min Sok Chon
4620 Convoy Street 92111

What Month Is It?

I believe it's June.  In fact, I believe it is officially "late" June.  So why is it still overcast and cold?  I'm wearing a sweater today.  True, I AM wearing sandals, but a sweater nonetheless.  I know, people.  It's called "June Gloom."  But this is ridiculous.  I'm ready for summer and I want it NOW.


After re-reading my last post, I realized I said that there's just something about the South.  Is it like a bad break-up?  Am I still secretly in love with the South; therefore, I can't fall in love with San Diego?  Or is San Diego more like a friend who I hang out with and then later we're gonna realize that we were right for each other all along?  Is this my romantic comedy?

My Old Kentucky Home

It's been a long time since I have done anything at all.  I ride my bike to the library to borrow Six Feet Under DVDs.  I've made it through seasons 2 and 3 more quickly than I'd like to admit.  Sad, yes; entertaining?  Also yes.

Yesterday, I was able to go on to the Naval Base just 1.5 miles from my house--near the airport.  It was one of my jobs' (I have more than one which is "uniquely American" according to good ol' W.) graduation day.  It was freezing cold in the morning (probably around 60.  Not freezing exactly, but freezing none the less), but it turned out to be a great day.  The graduation speaker was the owner of Taylor Guitars.  His commencement speech was all about following your dream, but more importantly, knowing what your dream is.  A good speech, but not anything dramatically different from any other commencement speech.  But--BUT--BUT--he admitted he wasn't the best guitar player although he had a passion for building them.  He invited his friend to the ceremony to actually play the Liberty Tree guitar.  And the guitar struck my heart strings, and I became very homesick.

He played music that one would hear at the Grand Ol' Opry (he was traveling there this week), music that makes me feel comfortable.  There is just something about the Grand Ol' South that makes me want to smile.

While living abroad, the other expats might say something negative about the US and I could always let it go...It never really bothered me.  But the minute ANYONE said ANYTHING negative about the south, I would lose it.  I remember this one idiot I met in Hongdae with E.  She brought him to our table and was like, "This is Casper."  First of all, dumb name.  He sat down.  We began asking the usual expat questionnaire:

Me:    Where are you from?
Him:  Boston, what about you?
Me:    Kentucky.
Him:  Kentucky?!?!  Oh I bet your dad has 5 different wives and you live in a trailer park!  HAHhaha..
Me:   (Slamming beer onto table) GET THE F*** AWAY FROM ME, A**HOLE!

There was more to my response, but you get the drift.  Later he explained to me that he was just testing me...to see if I was cool.  Only people with low self-esteem test other people to see if they're cool.  Especially that way.

Maybe it's Father's Day.  Maybe it's the guitar pickin'.  Maybe it's the June Gloom.  But I am seriously missing my old Kentucky home.